How to Get Your Resistant Loved One to Accept Help and Recovery
Getting a loved one into rehab is one of life’s most urgent situations. And it could be one of the biggest challenges you ever face. As you approach your loved one with an offer of help, you should be prepared for a possible rejection, simply because of the nature of addiction. To save your loved one’s life, it may be necessary to stage an intervention. The better you prepare for this action, the more likely it will be successful and result in your loved one not only arriving at rehab but also taking the program seriously when he (or she) gets there.
Just like drug addiction, the need for an intervention doesn’t discriminate. Anyone of any social class, religion, age or gender can become addicted. And anyone of any characteristic may require an intervention before he can accept the help that his family so generously offers.
The right time for an intervention is immediately after a family has offered help but received a rejection in return. You can’t count on addiction going away on its own. Problems related to addiction routinely get worse the longer addiction lasts. And of course, the individual has more chances to overdose, become sick, injured or incarcerated or have a disabling accident. If your offer of help is refused, or if you feel you just cannot handle your loved one, the right thing to do is immediately engage a professional interventionist. We can help you through the hard choices and challenges associated with turning this person’s viewpoint around so that he makes his own decision to get help.
Here’s how you can tell. Is the individual making poor choices that damage his or other people’s lives? Despite the harm resulting from these choices, is he continuing to use drugs or drink? If the person sees the harm and curbs his own use, he’s not addicted. If he continues, he has lost control of his consumption of drugs or alcohol. He needs help.
Here’s a few examples of the signs that drug abuse has developed into addiction. Drug use or excessive alcohol use continues even though:
- He flunked out of college and had to move home.
- She has lost multiple jobs and is now broke.
- He ruined his marriage and his relationship with his children.
- He has stolen from his family, friends and business and sold everything of value that he owned.
- Her friends and family no longer want her around.
- His health has deteriorated. He may have lost or gained weight to an unhealthy degree, may suffer from staph or other infections or suffer from heart, stomach, lung or kidney problems.
- He may be mentally erratic, delusional, incoherent or paranoid.
- He has been arrested for DUI, shoplifting, theft, trespassing, vandalism, assault or other crimes related to his drug or alcohol use.
- She is not doing well in life and and refuses to acknowledge this fact or do anything about it.
When you see these or similar signs, there is no time to waste. There is a bigger problem at the bottom of these situations. In so many cases, it is substance abuse and the only workable answer is drug rehab.
An effective intervention enables you to make rehab happen. Treating the person with kid gloves, trying not to offend him, avoiding the hard questions – none of these tactics will work.
An intervention finally puts the family in control. The addicted person has been manipulating those around him, lying, stealing and wreaking havoc. Parents, siblings, spouses and children have suffered sleepless nights and constant stress. Very often, they have experienced abuse, neglect and illnesses of their own. When the addicted person consents to start rehab, the family is given back control over their own lives, homes, health and finances. Healing can now start for the entire family.
So how do you regain control? As you and your family work with your Intervention Specialist, you will agree on certain standards of behavior and then hold that person to these standards. The person who can’t live up to these standards will be required to go to rehab or else you and the family will withdraw every bit of your financial and emotional support. Exactly how to do this will be explained in detail in this guide.